Month: July 2009

In short what do you do?

How many of us can rely on our memories to coherently tell people we have just met what we do? Why we do it? And why they should keep us in mind for future business? Remember that almost all the best speeches have been well prepared and rehearsed until they seem "off the cuff" tough isn't it?

Content should appeal not only to the listener but to the twenty people they meet today who they need to impress. So next time you present your elevator pitch or one minute promotion please bear it in mind that you need to give me enough good stuff about your business to make me look good!

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How many of us really know who or what is competition? Not many people it seems. I became curious yesterday by talking with someone who really had no idea what competition was or what benefit it could bring their company. More importantly they were unaware where the real danger to their business came from. In short you are far more likely to do serious damage to your own business with a closed attitude than anything anyone else could even try to do to you. So keeping your mind open will keep you doors open.

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Tax shouldn’t be taxing……

I am having increasing problems just getting HMRC to understand basic mathematics at the moment so if you too are experiencing the benefits of a dumbed down educational system with lazy confrontational staff based in Shipley who will not come out from behind their desks then join the club.
I have finally decided to explain to the HMRC that they are getting no more money out of my company until they find out where the last £125K has gone.

I can only ignore them now and write on every demand “account in dispute” with the word dispute in bold red letters!

Marketing Logic and where is next meal coming from

I was talking to a client trying to explain how they should profile their existing best customers in order to find clients that are similar who are more likely to have what they want and we did have a couple of misunderstandings as they thought that I wanted to market to their existing customers and in the great scheme of things that is probably what I would have suggested they do as mining the existing customer base is an excellent source of low cost easy to sell to customers which don’t leave you feeling like you have to introduce yourself time and time again. However this is not what I mean’t and in the end I had to get out the ol’ bag of analogies and the one that seemed to fit best was the lion’s lunch.
Lions sit around the drinking pool all afternoon not because they are thirsty or in case they will get thirsty later it’s because by and by their lunch will pop along, probably in a weakened state ready to be snapped up. Weakened because in the world of the gazelle, smartish creatures who can spot a lion from a sniff in the wind 10 miles away and a pool of drinking water 20 miles away but they have to weigh up how long can they try to wait out the lions, hoping for boredom, until they just cannot wait any longer for a drink and having to face the snoozing preditor against dropping down with heat exhaustion and dying of thirst. I reckon that they think that they can get away with it if only their mates get eaten first so they go on down en-masse and attempt to slurp it up. My money is on the Lion as whatever happens he has weighed it up and will probably either get a healthy fresh snack or a bit of a dehydrated take away – worst case. The analogy a bit long winded is that the Lion has profiled his lunch and knows their behaviour and with the right attack strategy will snaffle enough earnings to feed the wife and kids for another day at least then it’s back to snoozing. Find your waterhole profile your lunch and prepare your strategy. Data mining has never been so tasty…

Anyone for tennis?

I watched the monster truck derby which women's tennis has become and thought that unless they play the full five sets those demure little waifs known collectively as "the williams sisters " will continue to behave like city traders quick nasty without care for the game they owe so much to and about to get caught out. On the other hand the men's final is much more like the small business environment. Worth the long term fight and having to go the distance. Of the two the mens had no losers not the players, not the spectators and not the game. The debacle on saturday ensured that everyone lost. Talk about sub prime sport!

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